MSS004 – The Power Exchange Relationship | Circle

Power Exchange Feature


Power Exchange Relationship | Circle

What is it?

Using Marriage’s Sexiest Secret, a couple Creates, Feeds, and Feasts from a circle of created power, or Exchange of Power.  In practicing The Power Exchange, a new marital synergy is generated, this creating or rekindling magical sexual energy between a couple. This Power Exchange Circe will Sate both the husband and wife’s needs. Working together they will both find a mutual acceptance along with a deeper spiritual connection in practicing this dynamic.

The Power Exchange satisfies two very important needs that married couples require from one another.

~A wife’s craving or hunger for intimacy or closeness with her husband.
~A husband’s search for that unexplained trust & respect from his wife.

Learn more about a relationship’s Power Exchange.

Show Notes

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Orgasm Training and Control


  • Mr. Fox
  • Little Kaninchen


Little Kaninchen 0:21
Yes, A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving. It’s one of my all time favs. I used to make a night of it with the kiddos when they were younger. And now I just have Mr. Fox to torture and have him sit with me and watch it every year.

Mr Fox 0:37
Oh, that’s not torture. lk

Little Kaninchen 0:42
Well, welcome everyone to the married with a twist podcast. Hopefully, your turkeys are stuffed wink wink. I hope Mr. Fox stuffs mine later. Are you all ready for your family gatherings? Well, let’s hurry so you can get back to it. First, we both want to wish you all a wonderful Charlie Brown Thanksgiving. Our podcast tonight will be about what has happened in the subMrs community this past month. Thanksgiving historically, these interesting dirty little details about these Puritans. And then our main focus is the Power Exchange Relationship, feeding into the circle and feasting from it since we’re all gonna be feasting on Turkey. In just a day or so.

Mr. Fox 1:31
That sounds pretty good.

Little Kaninchen 1:34
Finally, we’ll kind of wrap it up with what’s coming in December.

Mr Fox 1:39
And at the end of this podcast, to all of the pilgrims and the Indians that make it to the end, I will share about our Thanksgiving toast, and our special invitation for all of you to attend this unique and personal annual event. So stick around to the end of it. Unless you already know the details. And we’ll tell you more.

Little Kaninchen 2:15
Do you want to know a secret? Do you want to have a secret? A dirty little secret? A secret that you only share with your spouse? A secret that is so magical, so intimate in ways you can only imagine.

Mr Fox 2:29
Oh, come on. You must be curious.

Little Kaninchen 2:33
Marriage has a new secret a relationship accessory of sorts. Come fall down our rabbit hole. And we’ll share our secret about this magical wonderland of creating your own intimacy. We can give you all the edge without you or your marriage ever getting cut. Welcome to the married with the twist podcast.

Mr Fox 2:53
Greetings everyone. Mr. Fox and little kaninchen or lk? We are your hosts and founders of marriage’s sexiest new secret, the leader-follower dynamic, also known as married dominance and submission.

Little Kaninchen 3:09
Oh man, you just told him the secret.

What happened to November? Or should I say what happened in November on subMrs? I wanted to share a little bit of what we did this past month in the community. First of all, I wanted to twist the normal Thanksgiving into something a little more twisted for everyone to experience.

Mr Fox 3:32
lk, twist something

Little Kaninchen 3:34
Always, always twisted. November’s focus was all about giving and feasting. We kind of skip right into the Christmas season, so I thought it might be a good time to give our Sir’s some attention. Show them our thanks before Christmas and all those trimmings just completely take over.

Exactly. that’s what I’m talking about. November was all about the member, your Sir’s member that is. November we had a lot of fun things scheduled in our communities. I think that women just had just as much fun as the men did. And we had an exercise, harvesting your Sir’s seed that continued all month long. That was a lot of fun. And then we had several live chats. Thanks and giving for your Sir, like how to give him a better blow job, great techniques. We even had everybody bring their bananas.

Mr Fox 4:32
I like that kind of class.

Little Kaninchen 4:35
If you missed it, please go to the fitness group and our leader there Pearl, she’s really great. She will fill you in on all those little details. But we also talked about how blowjobs really are more like what we call face fucking. Sorry, I’m going to use that word a lot probably in this But we talk more about how face fucking versus blowjob. We did a whole entire thing on that. We talked about cock worship and it’s tools and toys within a workshop, which was really fabulous. We also had another spiritual chat about the power behind the penis, which was so interesting. If you haven’t joined the spiritual group yet. please do join her group. It is just great information. And then we had Marriage’s Sexiest New Secret member chat with me, lk. And we have lots of people attend and we had so much fun there. So I invite you to join us, those will happen every single month. Please stay tuned for those. We had a few twisted holidays. We did Friday the 13th, making your own luck. We also had a national go for a ride or of course I had to twist that into cowgirl day or reverse cowgirl day. We still have Beaver Moon coming up. I don’t think I need to explain that. And one more St. Andrew’s day, which I’m pretty sure you all can figure out how I twisted that one. So that was really where our November went. It was fantastic. We have just a few more things left. We also are doing a fantastic book series. So tune in for that join our book club, and otherwise, we’ll just move forward.

Mr Fox 6:29
Alright, lk, then let’s talk Turkey. Let’s talk Thanksgiving. November is about celebrating the year’s harvest and being thankful for the blessings of the past year. Thanksgiving celebrations are usually modeled around the year 1621’s original harvest dinner, shared by the English pilgrims of Plymouth, Massachusetts, and the Wampanoag Indian people. The celebration was prompted by the year’s good harvest. The Indians had helped the pilgrims get through the previous winter by giving them food in that time of scarcity. Both groups exchanged food and gave thanks. What a noble beginning to the holiday.

Little Kaninchen 7:13
Some fun PDLD the pilgrim’s dirty little details. Back then premarital sex was punished severely and in historical colonial records it was estimated that the percentage of couples who had premarital sex averaged 18.7% There was an equal percentage of couples who never did marry but simply enjoyed the sex and then took their punishment if any from their Governing Council. That accounts for a total over 37.4% of the Plymouth Colony engaging in a lot of fun sex, not to mention the percentage that went totally undiscovered. The University of Virginia estimates that at least 50% of the colony was messing around in the cornfields when nobody was looking. No wonder they nearly starved those first few years, they were sowing a different kind of seed.

Mr Fox 8:08
I want to know who’s doing the study at the University of Virginia on colonies, sex habits in the cornfields

Little Kaninchen 8:16
they’re probably all related to them. It’s near and dear to their heart.

Mr Fox 8:20
I don’t want to know what my elders are doing.

Little Kaninchen 8:23
I thought it was pretty interesting.

Mr Fox 8:25
It is, it is.

Little Kaninchen 8:26
Yeah. The second detail I thought was interesting was the sexual offenses were rarely punished by death. With the percentage that I mentioned before. I suspect if they had tried to implement death for every sexual offense, or what they saw as an offense, there would have been very few colonists left. The more common punishment was whipping, flogging, branding. Or they have a favorite, the time you spent at the pillory or the public stockade, they put you up on a block and put your head and arms and maybe feet in you know a stockade. And if those of you don’t know what a pillory is, a pillory is a device made up of wooden or a metal framework erected on a post with holes for securing your head hands. It was normally used for punishments or public humiliations.

Mr Fox 9:16
Yeah, I would call it a stockade. I can’t wait for the day. I can have one of those in a playroom with you.

Little Kaninchen 9:22
Oh, I would love a pillory.

Mr Fox 9:24
That would be awesome.

Little Kaninchen 9:24
Yeah, I would love it. But maybe not in public. At least not in public, naked, or anything like that. But let’s move on. We kind of digressed. But there was a 16-year-old boy that was once executed for beastility, along with the guilty livestock. The story goes with a surge of hormones he had turned to those who he knew best accused of buggery and then indicted with a mare, a cow, two goats, five sheep, two calves, and guess what a turkey.

Mr Fox 10:00
Wow, he had a whole harem that’s unbelievable.

Little Kaninchen 10:03
Yeah. I think he was like, 16.

Mr Fox 10:06
He was 16.

Little Kaninchen 10:07
Yeah. Well, he was first discovered by one that accidentally saw the lewd practice. When he was doing his mare. He confessed to his multiple sins. And as punishment, he was forced to watch all the animals killed. Now, at first, the court had a problem figuring out which sheep you know, they weren’t sure which ones that he had favored. So as sheep look pretty much the same, but the boy was helpful and pointed out all his sex partners. So after made to watch all the animals killed and buried in a pit, that boy was then hung.

Mr Fox 10:50
That’s terrible.

Little Kaninchen 10:51
Very few of those cases that said, but that was a pretty interesting one. Then there’s one more little detail. A woman was once convicted of uncleanness with an Indian and was sentenced to publicly being whipped. And then they would lead her by cart through the town, and she was to wear a scarlet letter AD badge on her arm to show that she wasn’t adulterous. If she was found without it, she would be branded on her forehead. You don’t even want to know what happened to the Indian. Let’s just say, I would imagine he didn’t make it for dinner that year.

Mr Fox 11:33
The Pilgrims and Indians had their share of challenges as well. Bad marriages, cheating spouses, teenagers with hormones, etc. In some ways, life seems much the same now, as it did then. Today, some people still have a lot in common with the pilgrims of the past, the hypocritical image of sexuality. We’re trying to change that and we believe it’s working. Our wish for everyone this Thanksgiving and always is to first be thankful and show your gratitude by giving. Give to each other by exploring and enjoying your sexuality with your partner or your spouse. Keep in mind as you gather around the turkey this Thanksgiving, and quit thinking about that boy and his Turkey. Just give thanks, you weren’t one of those pilgrims or one of those turkeys.

Little Kaninchen 12:22
The power exchange relationship feeding into the circle and feasting from it. Let’s start with what is the power exchange. Using marriage’s sexy a secret. A couple creates and feeds and feeds from a circle of creative power or the exchange of that power and practicing the power exchange a new marital synergy is generated. This creating or rekindling magic sexual energy between a couple. This power exchange circle will sate both the husband and wife’s needs. Working together they both find a mutual acceptance along with a deeper spiritual connection and practicing of the dynamic. I want to mention just one more time. The power exchange satisfies two very important needs that every married couple requires from one another. Okay, first of all, a wife’s craving hunger for intimacy or closeness with her husband, she really wants a partner. And the husbands search for that unexplained trust and respect from his wife, and the fact that she’ll give him pussy whenever he wants.

Mr Fox 13:35
Let’s talk about the circle. We define a power exchange circle as a circle of energy that is created by a couple that is in sync emotionally, spiritually mentally, and physically by using the DSM methodology of the power exchange relationship. So imagine if you will a large circle a circular wave of moving energy comprised of two independent components, one fed by a bright red-orange light, the leader’s energy and the other of bright blue-green light, the followers energy this circle of energy represents your power exchange dynamic. Partners feed into this circle strengthening it, then in turn feeding or feasting from their combined energies within the circle. But your partners must contribute to the circle in order to be able to feed from it. The circle is only sustainable to feed both partners. If it constitutes energy from both partners. A couple initiates the circle by first completing the setup steps of the power exchange dynamic. As they begin to practice their roles demonstrating growth in them, the circle begins to form. Next, the focus is on building the circle’s strength and its energy or movement. This happens when both partners are fully engaged and practicing regularly. Even daily, this feeds the circle, creating a synergy. That’s the interaction or cooperation of two or more people to produce a combined effect greater than the sum of their separate effects, which I think also would go into talking about our community and the value of community.

Little Kaninchen 15:21
This takes us into that this type of relationship is a relationship with benefits. Do you know what they say? what you put in, you get out, nothing is truer than with this power exchange. This circle is so much more as it feeds a couple in all sorts of ways. This type of relationship is one with many, many benefits. Personally, this type of dynamic benefits you, your marriage, your family, and even your friends, I’m talking even your coworkers, a husband many times feels more dominant. When he does this type of thing. He carries himself with more confidence. This has an overall effect on him and everyone he basically figuratively touches.

He has more confidence in his choices, his decisions, not only at home, but at work. everywhere he goes. Everyone who comes in contact will feel it see it in his actions. A wife feels more balanced in her marriage has less anxiety and stress. The feeling of protection and appreciation is giving her that emotional intimacy that she so badly needs, she will pass it forward to others, making her a better version of herself. She will be a better wife, a better mother, a better friend, and even a better co-worker.

Mr Fox 16:42
So lk, I think that’s a pretty powerful paragraph right there. And I think you start it with one of the most awesome quotes I can even imagine, right? Don’t be upset with the results you didn’t get from the work you didn’t do. I mean, just like you said, when you started this, we’re gonna get out of it, whatever we put into it. Don’t be surprised if it if it’s not working, right, like, Look at yourself.

Little Kaninchen 17:03
Yes, I think that many times both partners, you know, if they start out with using our method and getting the foundations and doing those first steps, that’s why they’re so important. So you both understand there are responsibilities and, you understand that now you’re going to make your marriage a priority.

Mr Fox 17:22
It is hard work. I mean, that’s also the point, I think of what you’re saying. Like it’s not like we just start down this journey and everything is gonna be I don’t know what you call it lk, pixie dust. And yes, is that a reality? Is that a real saying, lk? Right. But it’s, it’s hard work, you have to roll up your sleeves and get into it. And if you want the results, you’re gonna have to, you’re gonna have to put into it.

Little Kaninchen 17:43
Yeah, you work hard. But you get to play harder. And that kind of hard, fun is the most fun and know what you get out of it. There’s nothing better,

Mr Fox 17:52
Right? And it goes deeper than just fantastic, phenomenal sex and a better marriage. Right? Like, as you’re pointing out, you’re gonna have a better version of yourself, you’re always constantly working on being a better person and creating a, your happiness.

Little Kaninchen 18:07
Yeah, the synergy the circle will want to will make you want to become a better person, a better wife, a better husband. It actually carries on throughout every aspect of your life. Really?

Mr Fox 18:24
I was just going to comment how the word synergy that you just brought up, I think is so powerful in this right, I think in every relationship, that that concept that you can have more together with somebody, then you could produce independently on your own. And that’s really what synergy means. When when two people come together, and they’re working with the same goal in mind that they will have more than they could have by themselves. And I think that’s the power of a relationship to begin with. But it’s especially true when we align everybody with those DSM foundations. Everybody gets aligned, and I think it’s a power that is almost unstoppable.

Little Kaninchen 19:05
So you’re both setting an intention to go somewhere certain goal, a certain relationship, both, you know, deciding, intentionally deciding to have a leader-follower relationship,

Mr Fox 19:17
right? Yep. And we’re helping each other do it, we’re supporting each other and creating an environment for the other person to excel all the time and having that in the forefront of our mind. So it’s not accidental for waiting to accidentally have a wonderful mind-blowing relationship. It’s probably not gonna happen anytime soon, right? Like lk, said, it’s got to have intention. We have to have that intent in the front of our minds, and we have to work hard at it every day.

Little Kaninchen 19:42
And that’s something you want to do if you’re married and you have a marriage and there’s nothing better. I’m not kidding you. If you think about it, there’s nothing better than having a fabulous marriage. I mean, there is nothing better than that. So you know, you put a little in You get a little out, you put a whole lot in, you’re gonna get a whole lot out. That’s my, basically, my thought will go into like the power of attraction within the circle. Okay, this exchange helps both partners produced like that chemical and endorphins that can’t be seen, you can’t really touch them. But they make you happier and healthier and even draw outside people to you both, individually and as a couple. They feel the pull, but they’re not sure why they feel that pull towards you. We have had multiple times when complete strangers have paid for our drinks or dinners. Or, well, basically just because of no other reason, then we just look like we were so much in love. They want to be a part of it. They want to be around that

Little Kaninchen 20:52
That’s what they’re thinking. They are thinking, what is their secret? It’s truly a chemical pull you have on both your foreheads and invisibly thing that’s written there that says, I love my partner. I love my marriage. And it’s so sexy, and we have a secret.

Mr Fox 21:16
Men are from Mars and women are from Venus. I’m sure that you’ve heard this before. But what do we mean when we say it here? The dominant leaders are from Mars, meaning they have a mythological connection with Mars or Aries, the Roman god of war, based on Aries, the Greek god of war. The male gender symbol is historically represented by Mars’s sword and shield, and the element iron, in alchemy. These dominant leaders often live in a land of what I would call black and white, right? Meaning they also respond well to their roles, especially in the mental and physical aspects. They are warriors.

It’s kind of, In summary, lk, when I talk about the mental and the physical, right, like we’re not taking anything away from gender or anything like that, we’re just saying that I think most people see guys as being the brute or the warrior. And not that guys are, have a better mental capacity. I wouldn’t say that at all. I don’t know how to word it properly, right? Like I’m thinking logically, but it’s not. It’s not that women aren’t logical at all, I think it might be more of the lack of emotion men put into things.

Little Kaninchen 22:38
I think men in general have more of those parts. internally. There’s a dominant partner or submissive partner, as a leader, there’s a follower, you know, not exactly like we said, we don’t always have to go by gender, but I’m just saying that sometimes the more the leader or the more dominant partner tends to have those traits. So and again, just the same thing with a ball or submissive partner, you know, you actually take on those trades stronger in those traits. It’s just like, you know, if you’re a better fisherman than the other person, the same thing. Men are warriors are cavemen. They have the penis of power, and they love to fix around. And they never asked.

Mr Fox 23:23
That’s true. Now we have Siri to get us lost.

Little Kaninchen 23:28
So now let’s talk a little bit more about Venus. Okay, well, the follower or submissive partner we’re from Venus, Venus, or Aphrodite. Venus was the Roman goddess of love Aphrodite was the Greek goddess of love. Today’s female gender symbol historically was said to be Venus’s mirror, the same female symbol of the element, that is copper, in alchemy. Followers live in the land of all shades of grey, not just the land of 50 Shades of Grey, but we live in a spiritual and emotional and, give that energy into the circle. Overall, the circle is made up of the actions and thoughts of both Venus and Mars. The circle is fed when both partners are fulfilling their leader-follower roles with their thoughts and actions. Let’s talk a little bit more about feeding the circle. Once the power exchange circle is formed, its energy is magical. The circle wants to be fed from the mind, body, and spirit of both participants. We are made up of two parts. First material or the physical body, this part can be seen and touched. Second, immaterial and yet impalpable are the soul or spirit or the mind or conscious and emotions. Keep in mind the masculine parts the physical and mental, those being fed into and from the circle more by the leader or the dominant partner, the feminine or the Following partner is fed and gives more into the emotional-spiritual energy of the circle. All these parts when in balance, your dynamic or circle will be at its very best, each figuring out how their part can help the other partner and the dynamic work better for them both. So that’s a mouthful. So let’s talk about what does that all mean?

Women are Venus, once a committed partner, and she needs emotional intimacy. So she wants and she needs, she needs to feel a closeness to get physically intimate or have sex with her partner. While a man or Mars needs physical intimacy, or let’s just say he needs some pussy, to be able to open up enough to show women the emotional intimacy they need, or the partner they wish for. So to say that a couple as vanilla is is at a stalemate is an understatement. In our method, we have figured out a way to have both feeds into the circle, so that they can get what they need. So they can give it to their partner, what they truly desire. The ladies have heard me say before, you need to harden your partner before he can soften up, but you need to let him in, to plunder to his deepest wishes so that you can receive what you are wanting.

Mr Fox 26:31
That’s funny, okay, because I would be telling the guys you need to harden up in order to ponder into her deepest desire. close, very close, slightly, slightly different at the truth.

Let’s talk warrior lk. The feeding of Mars, the dominant or leading partner. his confidence comes from her words of encouragement, accompanied by her respect, and her unwavering trust and support. She offers him her vulnerability that gives him the dark intimacies that he really desires. His eyes will begin to open allowing him to see a new version of her, she will give him her trust and respect. Once she is fed what she needs, he will want to make her his own in every way. Since she feeds into the circle as well as feeds from the circle. She can only sustain her actions if she’s being fed in return. He will say, You are mine, and she will surrender herself to him. How does the dominant of the power exchange feed what feeds him? The dominant feeds from the circle and his partner, her body, her mind her spirit, his lead and command willfully followed, verbal accolades, acknowledgment, appreciation for the dynamic for his leadership, exhibiting satisfaction, comfort and following his leadership, relinquishing control of her body and scenes and play, sharing her darkest physical desires along with her vulnerabilities. Her engagement to her role, her patience, we had to put the P-word in here, her patience, and his fulfilling his role. Most importantly, her demonstrating respect and trust in him and his abilities to lead

Little Kaninchen 28:35
the feeding of Venus, the submissive or the following partner, she asks for the journey or daringly follows him into the fire and the ice and this thing that we do, while giving him the physical intimacy is he responds to most. His consistency is building a bridge to the emotional intimacy that she craves the most. emotional intimacy is what gives her the feeling of closeness with her husband. The security and unconditional support he offers and freely gives leads him to feel the trust and respect he wants. You will want to be made to be his in every way. She says I am yours and he takes her where she needs to go. The follower is fed by the circle as well as her serves mind, body and spirit. What feeds the follower, the submissive, the mind, his influence, his direction has words, feeling his control, not physically, but mentally, that he’s going to do things and tell her things that’s in her best interest and prove it over and over again until she can truly trust her body. She feeds from the pain and the pleasure he gives her. And in her spirit, his consistency and engagement commitment to the dynamic in that role. Most importantly, the intimate closeness The emotional intimacy she feels with him. She stands beside him as his equal to form a strong front, but she walks behind him as she has his back and she will follow him wherever he wants to go.

Mr Fox 30:17
Wow, super-powerful right there. lk, that sums up so much right? Say that one more time.

Little Kaninchen 30:25
She stands beside him at it as is equal to form a strong front, but she walks behind him. She has his back and she will follow him wherever he needs to go

Mr Fox 30:36
love it.

Feasting. Feeding from within the circle’s excess energy that you both have built is what feasting is all about. When you and your partner have both made the conscious effort to build your roles and the dynamic, you will both feel love again, a deep love a connection made strong by the energy of the circle. You have and can now feast from the energy you both have created. Picture if you will a large spread of all of your favorite foods kind of like Thanksgiving, laid out on the most romantic candlelit table. All there just for your enjoyment. The circle has provided you both with the feast. You can now feast from one another’s mind, body and spirit. There’s an abundance its there for you to consume.

Little Kaninchen 31:35
What does this look like in reality? Remember one couple’s reality is not another person’s reality. So these are just an example. So maybe traveled together during this time of abundance you can you’ll feel that abundant feeling you’ll definitely feel it to do something you’ve been planning for a long time a trip that you haven’t you know that you’ve always dreamt of, but never have done romantic dinners, you know, overnights in the city next to yours away.

Mr Fox 32:03
We actually do that a lot.

Little Kaninchen 32:04
We do that all the time. So sexual scenes, extra-long scenes like five hour-long scenes. Those have been some of the best times we’ve laughed more we’ve cried more. We’ve done all those things during those extra long scenes.

Mr Fox 32:19
You are getting me excited now. So it’s really the podcast. So let’s get going.

Little Kaninchen 32:23
But celebrating your power exchange anniversaries, it is about celebrating everything you can life is hard enough to find reasons to celebrate. And when you feel you’re in that time of abundance within your circle, let go do those things that you’ve always wanted to go do go see a concert together, you know, somebody maybe you saw when you were younger, pull out that fun card and do something fun together. It’s about spending time together as a couple.

Okay, so this takes us into working in tandem. The circle in its energy and the entire dynamic, I usually compare it to a tandem bike or two-person bike, two seats, two wheels, four pedals, both members have to pedal the bike to make it work to easily pedal along. The sun is warm, the sky is blue, both of you easily pedaling along wind blowing in your face. Life is good. You are working together towards the same goal. All along you feel in total control of your marriage, your life, and yourself. Both of you feeding receiving the nourishment to the fullest extent. Then, all of a sudden, one of you stops pedaling. The other person feels that the ride is now so much more difficult. They’re doing it on their own. And they’re wondering, do I stop pedaling? Or do I continue pedaling on my own? I’ve seen it happen both ways. But there is only so much time one person can pedal before the bicycle with both of them on it will crash and burn or what I call crashing smolder. As dynamics energy is being lost. The fire or the energy will fade, the fire is going out the circle is now out of balance. It will begin to slow stall and possibly disappear. This means one person stops being or doing their role for the couple stops the regular practice of the foundations and rituals that they had been doing. Maybe an individual has lost interest or the dynamic is no longer working within their marriage. There are multiple reasons why a couple ends up in this type of situation sometimes it’s what we refer to as a second-year wall but that’s a whole other podcast.

Mr Fox 34:56
Yes, it would be an entire another podcast or two Some of the stuff that we’re talking about lk when we think about it, it just makes sense, right? Your analogy of the tandem bicycle. I mean, when you think about it, and sometimes I think relationships might feel that way. Like you’re the only one working right, the other partner stops pedaling like you were talking about. There’s almost a choice there that somebody makes, right? Do they stop pedaling, too? And then the journeys over? Do they start pedaling harder, like, like, there’s a choice there that somebody has to make when they feel that the other person isn’t pedaling? And sometimes you might want to take a closer look to because maybe that person’s pedaling twice as hard. And you just don’t recognize it. Right.

Little Kaninchen 35:39
Right. It’s like which choice I’ve seen people do it both ways. And unfortunately, I’ve seen both ways. Crash and smolder. Yeah. So and unfortunately, I think we have done both. So as I said, we are not one to, you know, don’t have mistakes, or haven’t done all of these things. So we can come back and tell everybody about our experiences.

Mr Fox 36:07
Well, we haven’t smoldered yet. I don’t think we’ve crashed.

Little Kaninchen 36:12
Yeah, we’ve crashed. Yeah, totally crashed. And, you know, but most times, you know, you do kind of have a choice. And sometimes, as I said, one person decides, or they may not even make a real decision to stop or slow down. Other things happen, vanilla, things happen within your life that maybe makes you stop remembering to do a ritual, or stop pedaling. You’re part of the bicycle or your responsibilities in that role. And some people just get freaking lazy, I’m gonna be honest with you like things are going along real good.

Mr Fox 36:50
Why are you looking at me directly when you said that

Little Kaninchen 36:52
consistency? So like I talk about all the time. So, but yeah, so I think that sometimes it’s not even an actual conscious choice that you’re doing, you just get lazy. Or you say, oh, we’ll do it next time. Oh, whatever, you’ll learn. And I think everybody crashes and smolders or crashes and burns, it happens. But it’s okay. Because we have given you tools to show you how to get up, wipe yourself off and get back on that bicycle,

Mr Fox 37:26
which is the most important thing, it’s gonna happen to everybody. I don’t care who it is, right? And it’s gonna happen multiple times. But you got to use the tools like lk is saying to get back on track to get the bike back up and get pedaling again. And there’s just such a huge multitude of reasons of what could be going on. Right, maybe somebody needs to slow down a little bit, maybe they just don’t have the capacity because maybe it’s the holiday season, maybe it’s Thanksgiving, and they need a little extra helping hand. Right,

Little Kaninchen 37:52
their job is getting more stressful,

Mr Fox 37:55
right? So it’s not that they can disembark or not pedal altogether. But maybe there are times when you do need to pedal a little harder to keep it going and keep you guys headed toward your destination or to keep you on your journey. So maybe it’s not always an equal pedal.

Moving right along the crash and smolder part of it, your mind body spirit together all make up this mystical garden. If the garden goes unattended or cared for, for a short period of time, even the soil might begin to lose it or share its nutrients actually right with other plants with weeds, or your crops may become consumed by insects. This only happens because of complacency and neglect. Once the power exchange circle has been established, do not allow it to recede back to your old vanilla habits. Tilling the soil and planting the garden was the majority of the work. Once established, maintaining it really isn’t that difficult. You’ve already done all the work, take care of it. Oftentimes, our emotions can become hypersensitive, causing us to point fingers maybe or cast blame at the other person. This bad habit can also lead to that victim mentality that is virtually self-destructive. The circle eliminates the ability to point the finger or place yourself as a victim, which I think is really huge with Manning up, right. That’s what we would say to people man up, Dom up. You’re not a victim of anything. You’re the leader, you’re in control, change it, you want a different, you want a different outcome, do something different. Most times when things falter within the circle, it doesn’t necessarily mean that a person that longer desires their role. It usually comes down to that vanilla life unexpectedly creeping back up on us. We all have it right. We have all these influences in our lives. We’re even more susceptible to the consequences of life. When we’re not adequately prepared to maintain the flow of the circle. We let the other partner take up the slack. Maybe when we get caught up in something else get in a rut without letting them know or communicating properly. So like, lk is talking about stresses at work a minute ago, right? She has no idea what’s going on at my work. So maybe I am stressed out, maybe I’m having a harder time maybe it’s taking more of my personal capacity to deal with it. If I’m not communicating it, lk has no idea what’s going on. Right. So back to that communication. If you begin to feel as if something’s wrong, or that you aren’t being fed the way that you need to be fed, you should stop take a look at yourself first. Are you feeding the circle in the manner that you should be? Is it possible that your partner is slowing or possibly succumbing to not being nourished or fed properly, herself or himself? No matter what the answers are to those questions, direct your initial focus, and feed your energy into the circle. It will not take long for your partner to notice your efforts and attention. The circle is momentarily out of balance, and you’re stepping up may cause its circle to lean even more to one side or the other. But usually, this accompanied with a fundamental downtime is all that you’ll need to create the balance again, to get your partner pedaling again. Think of a time when someone has done something selfless on their part, with nothing more in mind than to make you happy. How did it make you feel if they got you a gift if they did something and took it off your to-do list for you? lk, does that for me every now and then I’ll have something and she’ll just do it for me. How does it make you feel? If you’re like me, or most other people, you’ll think more highly of them instantly, you’ll think better of that person. And also, even more importantly, I think it generates something within us that we want to return that selfless generosity somehow. And this is exactly what we’re trying to accomplish by continuing to feed that circle. A couple of the most common words used in D|sM relationships are often consistency. And what’s the P-word? lk, I don’t remember. inconsistency is usually referred to by the submissive partner in regards to or dominant, and dominant partners usually talk about their submissive counterparts needing to learn more

Little Kaninchen 42:26

Mr Fox 42:27
Thank you.

Little Kaninchen 42:29
I hear the word not consistent regarding the leader, or no patience on the follower or the submissive side. Following submissive partners beware, playing the top or just being your vanilla wife, being that same old person you used to be eventually will again emasculate your sir, it will push him and his want for the power exchange dynamic further away. You must be vulnerable and submissive to him. We’re not saying it to be submissive or vulnerable to anybody else. But you must be vulnerable and show your submission to him. He only has to be your husband, your leader, your dominant. He must be responsible and build his role and walk that fine line of the dominant partner being trustworthy. And being a respectable gentleman. Both of you must stick with your work on your roles and the dynamic. Remember, you got to also keep it fresh, everything can get dull, so don’t forget to recreate it, make it more exciting. You can look at this first crash as a test sometimes to see if you both can do it or want it bad enough to get up on that bike again. As many of you know, once you get a taste of this dynamic, it’s like the most addictive drug to quote the movie Twilight. It’s your own personal heroine. The power exchange circle happens organically. But then it’s up to you both to put it in and do the work that keeps the circle or synergy moving within it. The best advice I can give is to be realistic and make the magic wherever and whenever you can.

This really is marriage’s sexy secret and the ultimate marriage accessory. I wish everyone the best in their journey.

Mr Fox 44:33
Remember our site and its articles are written from our own personal perspectives that would be mine and lk’s. He is used as a leader or a dominant partner and she is used as submissive or the following partner. Please understand that you can interchange these labels and make it match your own dynamic. However, that’ll work no matter your gender, sexual orientation. However you identify the power exchange relationship is For anyone that desires it,

Little Kaninchen 45:02
so you have read those books, watch the movies. Now you can have that fairy tale or their dark edge or even both, the exchange happens you feed from the circle from one another. The magic is in the journey. As a lifestyle dynamic, it is work and a little bit of change. But when you do it for the betterment of yourself, and most importantly, your marriage, it’s better than the best piece of chocolate cake, or I should say, maybe pumpkin pie. Give thanks. Give to one another, feast on one another’s mind, body, and spirit. Enjoy it to its fullest.

So let’s talk about what or who’s coming in December. You’re tied in December a top 10. The firm decem Believe it or not in Latin means 10 and Yuletide. It’s a time around Christmas. It’s the Christmas season. It’s actually December 1 through January 1. The celebration of Yuletide dates back many centuries and was originally a way to celebrate the winter solstice, which is December 21, the shortest day and longest darkest night of the entire year. But good news, the next day we start back the other direction. So even if it’s dark outside, we’ll discuss things that will bring you light and cheer. There will be a gift idea for your Sirs, and even ideas for your new dynamic, including a top 10 List of the must-haves for your D|s-M dynamic. We will help inspire you and help you bring in the new year. This month will be all about fun celebrations, gifts, and keeping your dynamic’s connection during all this holiday fun.

Mr Fox 46:50
Sounds fun. And to all the good pilgrims and Indians that made it to the end of our podcast, I’d like to thank everybody. I love that. Maybe I’ll have you on a thing with the feather on… Its a great idea. I’m digging this. Okay, but I’d like to thank everybody for making it to the end. We’re going to talk a little bit about the Thanksgiving tradition, which we’re going to do on Thanksgiving, November 26. This year at 7pm. Eastern time. It’s going to be a toast. You can read about it. I wrote an entire article on husDom about it, explaining it, it’s going to be a short toast basically, for lk and myself. The toasts is in respect to my father. But for everybody, you can toast whatever you want. This celebration is going to be for everybody. You can come alone, you can come with your partner, some people their spouses are working. And that’s just fine. We’re going to put the information out the login information. We’re going to do the meeting via zoom video meeting. We’re going to put the information on the husDOM. premium member chat and where would you put the login information on the

Little Kaninchen 48:03
It’s called the sub radio chat room.

Mr Fox 48:05
Okay, great. And before we go, we’d like to thank everybody that’s here listening to us. Like lk said one minute ago, we’d like to really give a lot of thanks to the team members that we have that make a lot of things happen behind the scenes here at husDOM and I’m sure subMrs. Yes. So huge gratitude toward everybody. We’d like to thank everybody that’s listening to us, everybody that supported us over the years, it’s been phenomenal. And while you’re here, we’re talking about giving thanks. If you guys would just take one minute, maybe it’s two minutes, and rate us for a podcast be giving there you go five stars, maybe a positive rating. That goes a long way in our visibility. We’re kind of new here. We don’t have a lot of podcasts, but that visibility is going to mean a lot for growing this thing that we all called D|s-M. So please just take a minute and do that for us. That would be awesome. And before we go the very last thing is I hope that we see everybody tomorrow night or November 26 at 7 pm. Eastern. And you’re ready Happy Thanksgiving.

Happy Thanksgiving. And

Little Kaninchen 49:12
we’re gonna say until then, so long

Mr. Fox 49:15

Little Kaninchen 49:17
saying good night. I hate to go and leave this pretty sight,


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